For my beloved mother : if you know something in deep my heart

This post i dedicate for my super kind people in my life, my inspiration, the only one woman who always save me and care if i hurt.   My mom. Herawati.

Dear mom.

Sometimes i feel confuse and bored to hear you grumble, sometimes i feel tired when i saw you come house after work with many bags of groceries, but with gloomy face that express if you are the only one super tired person in the world and then you look at me like i do not know anything about your work, so you always ask me and you never let me doing my favourite hobby(like sleep). I know mom if you're tired, i know that without you show your gloomy face. And i know dad is tired too, but he never talk too much, if he feel tired he always sleep. I think it is better choice mom. Sometimes i wanna scream and tell you thousand words in my mind but i know it will make you hurt. So i try as much as possible to keep quiet when you're talking, but its so hard to keep quiet when someone talking too much about us. Its feel like my brain will explode!

5 October 2012, you'll go to Makkah for hajj. and it means i won't met you for 2 months maybe. So many things you left here, especially cupi (your little son). I realize someday, i don't know when, you'll leave us like every people. Someday you'll back to Allah. I'm afraid if i make some mistake with you, it will be a unforgivable regret. i love you mom, really really love you. i still need you when i have big problem, i need your shoulder, i need your hand to wipe my hair, i need your warmth, and i think my brothers need many more than me. So i always pray to Allah after shalat "Ya Allah please do not take my parrents until we are ready, please let them to see their child success, please let them attend our wedding with healthy and happy and still life in this world, beside us, like today.

i love you mom...